EHW Ch75

1.

The first time Gu Fangzhi tried buying something from the system’s shop, he agonized over it for several days.

The prices were absurdly high, roughly fifteen to thirty times the cost in the modern world.
A small pack of tissues cost 150 coins, a bottle of cola 700 coins.

And that was the cheap stuff. The price tags for seeds or books came with so many trailing zeros that Gu Fangzhi’s eyes went blurry just looking at them.

Each reload earned him one coin. His current balance was just over a thousand, mostly “earned” through repeatedly traumatizing Pei Xin.

In the end, Gu Fangzhi wrote down a list of everything he wanted and drew lots to decide.

The winner: a bottle of cola.

He clicked Purchase on the shop screen, and moments later, an icy-cold cola bottle, beads of condensation glistening on its surface, appeared on the table in front of him.

His hands trembled with excitement as he poured a little into a tiny wine cup.

For such a historic occasion, his first system purchase, Gu Fangzhi insisted on inviting Pei Xin to witness it.

Pei Xin frowned deeply. “…Poison?”

Gu Fangzhi held the cup out to him. “Try it?”

Though Pei Xin always tried to act mature, he was still young; curiosity showed in his expression.

After a moment’s hesitation, he took the cup carefully.

He sipped, then removed the question mark from his tone. “Poison.”

Gu Fangzhi protested dramatically, “You dare insult your beloved’s treasure?!”

Pei Xin: “……”

So what was he then? The concubine losing to herbal medicine?

Pei Xin glared, stone-faced.

Still, the shopping experience ended happily enough, Gu Fangzhi clutching his cola bottle, Pei Xin chewing on a lollipop identical to little Manman’s.
A perfect ending to the day.

2.

To prove he wasn’t reliant on the save system, Gu Fangzhi made a bet with Pei Xin that he’d get through an entire day without using it.

Gu Fangzhi’s performance for the day:

Misspelled a word,

Tripped in front of his colleagues,

Spaced out twice and forgot to reply.

Pei Xin’s performance for the day:

Absentmindedly assumed Gu Fangzhi could reload,

Casually rubbed the shiny bald head of the Western envoy with his fingertip.

Pei Xin appeared at the Ministry of Rites later, expression pained.

“I lost. It seems the one who can’t live without saving… is me. I beg Teacher’s mercy.”

3.

The person responsible for recording Pei Xin’s daily life was a shadow-like eunuch, so quiet he was nearly invisible.

Gu Fangzhi had originally thought the man served Yang Luhai, but after asking, he learned the eunuch was actually in charge of keeping the emperor’s daily log.

Curious, he asked if he could take a look.

The eunuch didn’t hesitate, he handed it over.

Gu Fangzhi flipped open a page at random.

“On such-and-such date, the new emperor laughed loudly alone in the Hall of Nurtured Heart.”

“On such-and-such date, the new emperor suddenly awoke mid-sleep, shouting the name of Minister Gu.”

“On such-and-such date, the new emperor brought home a strange dog. The dog is deranged and bites indiscriminately, but the emperor dotes on it greatly.”

“On such-and-such date, the new emperor sought to take an old minister as his consort. Whether serious or jest, unclear. The empire was in uproar.”

“On such-and-such date, Minister Gu left after night duty; the emperor was in excellent spirits, smiling for the duration of one stick of incense.”

“On such-and-such date, the new emperor fell ill (later confirmed to be during the Liangshan campaign); Minister Gu accompanied him.”

……

A perfectly normal man had been recorded like a case study from “Heaven on the Left, Lunatic on the Right.”

Gu Fangzhi closed the book and handed it back. “Has His Majesty ever read this?”

The eunuch bowed. “Reporting to the Lord: His Majesty said there’s no need. He already knows what they’ll write, and reading it would only irritate him.”

Gu Fangzhi: “……”

Somehow, Pei Xin’s aura of Buddhist detachment seemed to deepen by the day.

4.

In spring, Snowball got sleepy and gained weight.

In summer, the heat made him lazy, he gained more weight.

In autumn, his constitution weakened, he ate more, and got fatter.

In winter, of course, it was fattening season, he grew even rounder.

5.

“You can’t skimp on education, and you can’t let children suffer.”

So Gu Fangzhi spent a small fortune of system currency to exchange for several exercise books for little Manman.

Day 1 –  Manman studied enthusiastically.

Day 2 –  Manman mysteriously developed a stomachache.

Day 3 –  Manman hid behind Pei Xin, shouting, “Emperor brother, save me!”

Pei Xin, completely disarmed by the child’s soft little voice, swept his imperial robe dramatically and declared, “If he doesn’t want to study, then so be it.”

A stick of incense later, both Pei Xin and Manman were sitting properly at the table, doing exercises together.

6.

There were two things Gu Fangzhi had always wanted to try but never dared,  getting a tattoo, and piercing his ear.

Now, with the save system, things were easy. He could experiment freely and undo it anytime.

One bright, breezy afternoon, he had Pei Xin find a tattoo master.

In ancient times, tattoos were punishments; the craftsman didn’t understand why Gu Fangzhi looked so excited.

He wiped down his tools cautiously. “Then, my lord, shall I begin?”

Gu Fangzhi nodded and extended his hand.

Even knowing he could reload, he still needed a moment to brace himself. He decided to start small, just a simple ring around his finger.

Pei Xin didn’t understand the appeal but didn’t interfere, crossing his arms to watch.

The master took Gu Fangzhi’s left hand, rough fingers rubbing his skin twice. Gu Fangzhi’s soft skin reddened instantly.

“Gentler,” Pei Xin said, frowning.

“T-this humble one… didn’t even use strength…” The master met Pei Xin’s cold gaze and immediately swallowed his words. Tales of the emperor’s ruthlessness flashed through his mind; he ducked his head miserably. “Yes, Your Majesty.”

He dipped the needle in ink and traced a circle around Gu Fangzhi’s finger. “Here, correct? It’ll sting a bit, please endure.”

Gu Fangzhi nodded, turning his face aside, unable to watch the long needle approach.

He felt the faint prickle of cold metal touch his skin, but before it pierced, Pei Xin’s voice cut in.

“Wait.”

Both Gu Fangzhi and the master turned toward him.

Pei Xin said to the craftsman, “Leave.”

The man blinked. “…?”

Though the emperor was young, his pale and brooding face was far more intimidating than Gu Fangzhi’s warm demeanor.

The master thought he must’ve done something wrong. Not daring to ask, he hastily gathered his belongings to leave, only to hear Pei Xin add, “Leave the tools.”

The master: “……??”

…Was His Majesty planning to confiscate his livelihood?

If he’d known, he would’ve brought a nicer set.

But he didn’t dare question. He dropped the bundle of tools and fled the hall.

Pei Xin sat down where the master had been. “I’ll do it.”

Only then did Gu Fangzhi realize why Pei Xin had driven the man out.

A moment ago, he’d even imagined an elaborate spy plot, the tattooist as an assassin from an enemy nation, caught red-handed by Pei Xin’s keen eyes.

He hesitated, then remembered how skillfully Pei Xin had once carved a lifelike jade dog, and agreed.

Pei Xin picked up the needle.

Leaving his mark on the skin of the one he loved stirred a strange excitement in him; even his fingers trembled faintly.

When the needle pierced the skin, Gu Fangzhi gasped sharply.

Pei Xin leaned in and kissed him gently, soothing. “Don’t move.”

After a few test strokes, Pei Xin grew adept.

Then, with quiet confidence, he gestured toward the bed.

“Lie down, Teacher,” he said.

 

6.

Gu Fangzhi pushed his clothes down to reveal the small of his back.

He reminded Pei Xin seriously, “Follow the design exactly,  dragon on the left, tiger on the right. It must look majestic!”

Pei Xin glanced at the crude, spine-tinglingly ugly sketch of the Azure Dragon and White Tiger.

“……”

“All right,” he said dryly. “I know what I’m doing. Teacher, just lie down.”

So Gu Fangzhi lay flat on the bed.

Soon, a burning-itching sensation spread across his back.

More than once, he regretted it and wanted to quit, but Pei Xin pressed him back down.

Eventually, Gu Fangzhi went numb,  and even dozed off, resting his head on his arm.

Pei Xin patted him awake. “Teacher.”

Still groggy, Gu Fangzhi immediately thought of the tattoo.

He stumbled to the table, twisting his torso to look into the mirror.

Pei Xin asked, “Well? How is it?”

The intricate lines intertwined across his lower back, dark ink curling elegantly along his waistline.

“Mmm, looks good. But… what is it? A snake?”

Pei Xin: “……”

“It’s phoenix feathers and a dragon’s tail,” Pei Xin said, frustrated. “Is it really that hard to tell?”

Now that he mentioned it, Gu Fangzhi could actually see it,  he just hadn’t been paying attention, still fixated on his dream of a dragon-and-tiger design.

He admired it for a long while, twisting happily from side to side, though a bit conflicted.

He was just about to ask whether Pei Xin planned to reload the save today or wait two days, when he suddenly felt warmth against his lower back.

Pei Xin was kneeling on one knee, his lips hovering over Gu Fangzhi’s skin, eyelashes trembling faintly.

Gu Fangzhi froze, embarrassed, and lifted a sleeve to hide his face. “…You little brat… you’re into that kind of thing?”

7.

Many years later, Gu Fangzhi finally reached the HE (Happy Ending) of the game.

Friends, colleagues, and subordinates surrounded his bedside.

Pei Xin held his hand tightly, lips pressed together.

Amid the sound of sobbing, Gu Fangzhi slowly closed his eyes.

But instead of darkness, his vision filled with glowing words:

[Congratulations, Player! You have achieved the HE ending – “Peace and Prosperity.”]

8.

Without pause, the game began its second playthrough.

Gu Fangzhi found himself back at the start, the young, sullen, pre-adult Pei Xin sat upon the dais, ordering the execution of every minister who dared to remonstrate.

Gu Fangzhi looked up at him and smiled.

Pei Xin nearly lost composure. With a quiet huff, he said, “Forget it. Court is dismissed.”

The ministers, spared from death, clutched their chests in relief.

Each one thought the same thing:

“They say serving an emperor is like serving a tiger… but this new ruler’s moods change faster than the wind. How are we supposed to survive?”

9.

After court, Gu Fangzhi returned to the Gu residence to visit Gu Yunchuan.

But since Gu Fangzhi had already given advance warning to his family, Gu Yunchuan wasn’t afraid at all, he was lying in bed, sleeping soundly.

Gu Fangzhi: “……”

Somehow… that felt extremely anticlimactic.

10.

Unexpectedly, Pei Xin himself came to the Gu residence.

When he saw Gu Fangzhi, he paused,  then reached out and gently brushed his thumb along Gu Fangzhi’s cheek.

Gu Fangzhi smiled. “Do I look younger?”

Pei Xin replied, “Teacher has always looked like this.”

Gu Fangzhi laughed. “Ah, so His Majesty has learned how to flatter people now.”

11.

After clearing the game’s HE route, players were rewarded with one day of vacation.

This vacation could be saved up or used immediately,  to travel to the past or the future.

Since it was his first reward, Gu Fangzhi decided not to save it up.

He wanted to take Pei Xin on a trip to the modern world.

After inputting the coordinates and time, his vision went black.

When consciousness returned, the sound of car horns filled his ears.

He opened his eyes,  and they were back in the modern world.

Because Gu Fangzhi already existed in this timeline, his consciousness naturally returned to his own modern body.

Pei Xin, however, retained his ancient form,  and walking through the bustling city streets in long robes drew quite a bit of attention.

It wasn’t even because of his outfit,  he was simply too handsome, like one of those models doing a hanfu photoshoot.

Someone even came up to ask, “Teacher, can I collect your photo for my album?”

Pei Xin, recalling Gu Fangzhi’s warning not to speak recklessly about unfamiliar things, simply turned to look at him.

Gu Fangzhi hadn’t fully caught the question. “Ah? I haven’t been to a post office in years.”

The person gave him a strange look and left, stifling laughter.

12.

At this point, Gu Fangzhi was already working as an intern, renting an apartment near his workplace.

He took Pei Xin there, intending to get him changed into modern clothes.

On the way, Pei Xin was utterly fascinated by the traffic.

To preserve the surprise, Gu Fangzhi had told him very little about the modern world.

Pei Xin figured the vehicles must be a kind of carriage, but after a long while of observation, he couldn’t find any horses.

He leaned close to Gu Fangzhi’s ear and whispered, “These carriages move so fast in such small space. What animal pulls them?”

Gu Fangzhi replied smoothly, “Cows and horses.”

Pei Xin: “……?”

13.

Gu Fangzhi had planned to show Pei Xin the modern scenery and local attractions.

But even the wisest make mistakes.

While waiting for Pei Xin to change, he casually opened his iPad,  and accidentally started watching a recommended melodramatic TV drama.

Pei Xin emerged from the bathroom, asking, “Is this how I’m supposed to wear it?”

Gu Fangzhi stepped up to fix his collar,  but Pei Xin’s gaze kept darting toward the iPad screen.

He held it in for a bit before asking, “Why did she kill her mother-in-law?”

Gu Fangzhi had no idea, so he skimmed through a few episodes to find the answer.
“Looks like… because the mother-in-law gave away her child.”

But that just led to more questions.

Pei Xin asked, “But she can’t bear children anymore, right? Then where did the current child come from?”

Gu Fangzhi: “……”

He hadn’t been paying attention to the plot at all, but now that Pei Xin mentioned it, his own curiosity was piqued.

So he restarted from episode one, pulled Pei Xin down onto the couch, and shoved a bag of chips into his hands. “Let’s watch together.”

14.

The only downside, was that the drama… wasn’t finished yet!

It ended right at the most nerve-wracking cliffhanger imaginable.

But that was fine.

Frustrating, yes, but next time they visited, they could keep watching.

15.

Never in his life had Gu Fangzhi expected that his “Modern Day Adventure” would consist of… binge-watching TV dramas.

But with Pei Xin sitting shoulder-to-shoulder beside him, even the most ridiculous soap opera felt warm and entertaining.

And thankfully,  there would be many, many more chances like this.

He could do whatever he wanted, as many times as he wished.